On God, and being God
Yet if we are all God, if only we could all open up to that fact. Then the abyss between man and God (which upholds the bridge that is religion) could be dispensed with. Then nature could be transfigured and we would live in a world of rapture and joy forever, enjoying celestial dialectics of interaction and engagement, that could dispense with the dialectics of conflict and struggle which are so central to the darwinian picture in a way that would not be boring. Most people seem to think a world without conflict would be static and dull and ive always resisted that idea.
That makes me think about the Eucharist, the mass as Catholics call it, where humans eat God. Symbolically this is a powerful idea if we contrast it with how nature operates in isolation from God, whereby living beings feed off each other in a mutually perpetuating feast of death. If we ate God instead (interiorised him intimately) we would not need to war against each other as we do at every level of human society, public and private (despite the efforts of manners, custom and law to hide this).
Recently a friend recommended that I post that on my blog. It appeared as a part of a longer email in which I traversed in a way I never have before what it might mean, and why it might have been, that over the course of the past 12 years, at various times, I have considered myself to be God. Not God in a New Agey wishy washy, amorphous, lets get hippy sense, you understand, but in an upright and definitive Abrahamic sense. Catch mi drift?
Perhaps unsurprisingly, I wrote about this in the context of discussing what madness is, and whether or not mad is what I am.
Anyway, whether or not I am mad, I hope the above makes plain that I never thought I was God in a way you might conventionally understand thinking oneself to be God must mean, and that the kind of God I have understood myself to be, whilst not the impersonal, undifferentiated, everythingness of Asia, was also far distant from the judgemental, all-powerful, joyless, pompous and long bearded taskmaster of popular conception.
That makes me think about the Eucharist, the mass as Catholics call it, where humans eat God. Symbolically this is a powerful idea if we contrast it with how nature operates in isolation from God, whereby living beings feed off each other in a mutually perpetuating feast of death. If we ate God instead (interiorised him intimately) we would not need to war against each other as we do at every level of human society, public and private (despite the efforts of manners, custom and law to hide this).
Recently a friend recommended that I post that on my blog. It appeared as a part of a longer email in which I traversed in a way I never have before what it might mean, and why it might have been, that over the course of the past 12 years, at various times, I have considered myself to be God. Not God in a New Agey wishy washy, amorphous, lets get hippy sense, you understand, but in an upright and definitive Abrahamic sense. Catch mi drift?
Perhaps unsurprisingly, I wrote about this in the context of discussing what madness is, and whether or not mad is what I am.
Anyway, whether or not I am mad, I hope the above makes plain that I never thought I was God in a way you might conventionally understand thinking oneself to be God must mean, and that the kind of God I have understood myself to be, whilst not the impersonal, undifferentiated, everythingness of Asia, was also far distant from the judgemental, all-powerful, joyless, pompous and long bearded taskmaster of popular conception.
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